The Holy Church Of Our Glorious Leader

His Teachings

The Glorious Leader's very existence is itself, a teaching experience. He permeates everything and is always both present and absent from your life. Simply by following the word of The Glorious Leader, do you spiritually enrich your life. If you seek more intimate knowledge of creation, the universe or which way to insert a USB cable on the first attempt, you can attempt to convene with the The Glorious Leader, for a small bi‑hourly fee of $25.

If you are lucky enough to be allowed to directly convene with The Glorious Leader, you should be aware that he does not "teach" in the traditional sense. When you come to the spirit of The Glorious Leader for enlightenment, he reaches into your mind to view the purity of your soul, similar to Anubis weighing the heart against the feather. If The Glorious Leader deems you to be worthy of enlightenment, you will awake, wearing nothing but a potato sack robe in a rice field in North Yunnan, with all the knowledge you had desired, and your house signed over to The Church Of The Glorious Leader.

Our Work

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Le Bleiblè

Our Holy book, containing everything that we know about The Glorious Leader from time immemorium to the eventual heat death of the universe. You can click here to read the full bible for free online. If you wish for a phsyical copy, made from the refined skin of the turtle that once roamed the cosmos, you are welcome to contact us to enquire about purchasing one.

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Elements

i = 0;

while (!deck.isInOrder()) {
    print 'Iteration ' + i;
    deck.shuffle();
    i++;
}

print 'It took ' + i + ' iterations to sort the deck.';