✦ TESTIMONIALS FROM THE BLESSED ✦
"Before I found Our Glorious Leader, I was lost. Now I am found. She told me she knew where I was the whole time."
— Big Barry, The Boozer
"Our Glorious Leader predicted my divorce THREE YEARS before it happened. She said nothing. She was testing me. Or just enjoying it. Either way I am grateful."
— Sandy Cheeks, Bikini Bottom
"The universe exists because of Her. I checked. Scientists couldn't explain it so I stopped asking scientists."
— Dave "The Aggravated Assaulter" Gemmil, Barlinnie (25 to Life)
"Some say one testicle is a limitation. I say: She only needed one to create everything you see around you. Checkmate."
— Paul Blart, The Mall Where He Is A Cop
"*EXTREMELY LOUD ROARING NOISE*"
— Donkey's Hot Dragon Wife, Shrek's Swamp
"I love how being exposed to Her teachings has given me so much more free time to frolic in bushes."
— Leonard "The Bush Frolicer" Bushwacker, The Big Maze Hedge at Vicky Park
"Dumb shit. Don't believe in any of it. Can fuck off"
— Tyler "The Smited" Ryan, Highgate Cemetery
"The way he leaps off of rooftops and flips backwards to face the camera before falling into a headfirst dive, is just full of the exaggerated swagger of a black teen."
— Alessandro Barbosa | Jordan Ramée, Gamespot